Navigating our emotions

A free workshop aims to help kids and young adults cope better with their emotions.

Surfing the Wave is a three-day emotion skills workshop starting on April 15, presented by the Psychology Group, to give 12 to 16-year-olds the tools to help regulate their emotions and develop better emotional intelligence (EQ).

The workshop will cover topics like mastering mindfulness to staying in the present, while learning to control what the Psychology Group calls ‘big colourful emotions’ such as sadness and anger, through emotional regulation.

Nicole Robinson, DBT Coordinator and Mental Health Clinician at the Psychology Group, hopes the workshop will help young people manage their emotions better and avoid the negative consequences of losing control of them.

“The idea is that we want people not to feel they are drowning in the waves of their emotions, but rather feel more in control and learn skills to surf the waves of emotions that they may experience.

“Just like waves, emotions can sometimes be calm and regulated, and at other times, a storm can hit, and the waves feel big and out of control. When our emotions feel big and out of control, we want to give people tools to know how to feel more in control to surf the wave, because telling the wave to go away or ignoring the waves doesn’t stop the storm.”

Robinson said those who have participated in past ‘Surfing the Wave’ workshops have come away with improved relationships, better emotional regulation, less problematic behaviours, and better responses in unexpected situations.

Not having emotional control leads to feelings of not being in control of one’s own life. One example is losing your temper at someone, you feel bad, for the outburst, at having lost control and not being the person you want to be.

Learning how to respond to that anger effectively gives people back control of how they want to live and respond to others.

“The emotions that are causing more suffering in our lives are the ones we want to learn to manage in a new way. Emotions themselves are not bad; we do not want to get rid of emotions, they have a function and are very important.

“They communicate information to us and others and prepare us for action. What we are trying to do is notice when these emotions feel out of control and have some skills to know how to respond to them in effective ways,” says Robinson.

Studies have shown that poor emotional control, often called emotional dysregulation, can lead to depression. Failing to manage intense emotions like sadness or anger can lead to emotional exhaustion, increased stress levels, low mood levels, and damaged relationships.

Surfing the Wave is a free event being held at Highbrook Medical at 31 Highbrook Drive, East Tamaki. Classes run from 9am until 2pm, on April 15, 16, and 17.